We all have dreams of that “someday” thing we are going to do. It is usually something that we have wanted for a long time but life has intervened. And often people who are more interested in helping people may be less inclined to put their own wishes first. I suggest that if you are in this situation you may want to review your “somedays” and maybe bring your dreams to the front burner.
Within the past year I have made some major changes in my life. I was born and raised in Colorado in the US which has magnificent mountains but very little water. I have always loved being near the water - ocean and lakes - and always wanted to live by the water. I woke up one day and realised I couldn’t under any definition call myself young anymore and that the years pass quickly. Being healthy now and mentally ok, I decided I had to make some changes.
I moved and I literally live on the shores of Lake Macquarie. Why did I do this instead of staying where I was (rural, inland Australia)? Because I realised the only person that could make my long-held dream to live by the water come true was me. No one else had the desire or the impetus to make that happen. Why now – well no one knows when they may either die or become physically or mentally unfit but the odds are increasing with each passing year. If I wanted to live by the water then I had to do it soon if not now!
Since I was disrupting a settled life, I expected that many would disagree with my decision. Few did which surprised me – even my mother who is a bit on the conservative side – said “Good – you have to do the things you need to do. I wish I had done more of those when I could.” (She is legally blind because of macular degeneration and lives in assisted living). Many individuals that I talked in my former home also were supportive – to the point I was slightly worried about a mass exodus of people following their dreams. And two of my friends have done something similar – leaving jobs and businesses to follow their dreams.
Of course, there were those that did not approve or were uneasy with the concept and they are entitled to their opinion. I didn’t make this decision to please others; I made it to fulfil something I really wanted to do. But just because it was good for me doesn’t mean it is for everyone and I wasn’t and am not pushing people to do what I am doing. It was just something that I had to do.
It has not all been daisies and sunshine; there are downsides to this decision as there is to any decision. I live by myself in a new environment and I am pretty much of an introvert so making new friends is not easy nor something I spend a lot of time doing. So there are many times I am lonely but that’s ok; being lonely is not the worst thing. But looking out over the lake at sunset or early in the morning with all of the boats gives me a sense of deep satisfaction. Why – I have no idea but something about the water just speaks to a deep part of me and basically makes me happy.
Looking at your “someday” things and deciding if these are things that you truly have to do and acknowledging the inevitable negative consequences are ways to make progress towards that someday dream. I recommend it; I really want to be able to have few regrets about things I wanted to do and didn’t when I finally am unable to keep following my dreams. (Oh did I mention I just bought a convertible SAAB just because it sounds like fun.) Someday things are all about being happy!